Sunday, April 25, 2010

Grow!

I am so excited!
My group has decided to spend the summer Experiencing God!
 I think it's rather appropriate living up in Alaska.  I know other people think they live in "God's Country," but I think He made Alaska in His most favorite  mood!  The mountains here are breathtakingly beautiful, the lakes are too numerous to count, the rivers vary from trickles to raging, and the wildlife is unbeatable.  All of these things are just beginning to emerge as the snow slowly melts and disappears.
It's actually my least favorite time of year. 
I've never liked spring.  It's such a tease.  You want and expect it to be all flowers and sunshine and it rarely cooperates.  Even when I lived in Kansas it was either too short and gave way to the blistering temperatures of summer, or it was simply bleak and dreary.  Yes, I'm a bit over-dramatic.
It's way worse in Alaska.  It has been a month of melting that reveals the brown and gray of the landscape, a stark contrast to the brilliant white of winter or the all-consuming greens of summer.  It's mucky and wet and cold.  I know I should be used to the cold, but when you are expecting the warmth, it makes the cold colder.  I joke that I "get" to experience an Alaskan winter, which is incredibly gorgeous, but then have to go through a Kansas winter which we call "Break-up."  The name is pretty self-explanatory, but this is when all the snow and ice break up and melt.  It looks like Kansas in the winter: gray and lifeless.  (I liken the bits of green in the fields of winter wheat to the spruce trees that break up the monotonous white and gray birch and aspen trunks.)
All this to say that I'm in such a need for a Spiritual Spring!  I'm ready to have my subdued Christian walk burst forth and sprout into something alive!  I'm ready to feel the Son warm me and make me grow this summer, and I'm excited about it!  As I am a plant person, these types of analogies resonate with me.  They are a little bit cheesy, but alas, that is my favorite food, so I suppose it's bound to come through.
Seriously, though, I walked around my yard yesterday when the sun warmed it to a balmy 49 degrees, and began to clear away the old debris around my perennials flowers.  Most of these were planted later last summer and didn't have too long to take root, so I'm curious as to what made it through our relatively mild winter.  As I pulled the wet and decayed leaves off the bases of the plants, I began to see tiny little peaks of green emerging.  I would position myself so I could kneel as close as possible without setting myself upon one of these hidden gems and bend down to get as close of a look as I could.  The sun was warming the mulch and I could smell the moist earth mingling with the threat of mosses and leaf mold.  It's a fabulous scent to this nose.  I began my daily walk-throughs a while ago when the first beds were appearing with little to no signs of life.  Lately, our weather has been warming, so my frustrations are easing and I'm seeing more and more.  A couple of times, I would uncover the expansion of a plant, and that usually makes me ecstatic!  I'm fond of the "bullies" and have little use for flowers that take an exceptional amount of babying.  I love to see my little leaves poking up through the barely warmed soil and I can't wait to see how much bigger it will be this year!  They always get bigger, you know.  And the bigger they get the more spectacular they are, but if they get too big, they can start to die out and need to be divided.
I can't wait to grow this summer!  I heartily dislike the notion that Bible Studies should disband for the summer.  In the craziness and fun of summer, I still need growth and Godly women to surround me.  I am so incredibly happy that I am not alone!  The great thing about it is I feel that I can expect the growth to happen, I am anticipating God to work in me and our group, and there will be no disappointed waiting for "spring" to arrive.  I can't wait to see the result!  I would even like to see an eventual "dividing."  I don't see it in our near future, but could honestly see each one of the members of our group leading a group someday.  For now, though, I'll brace myself and prepare to grow and Experience God!

Friday, April 16, 2010

Prep for Showings

I've been painting A LOT!  I totally repainted the upstairs (tv room) and bathroom and worked to clean out and eliminate clutter in order to streamline the rooms.  I've spent much energy preparing our home and trying to keep it ready for a last-minute showing.  To my dismay, the floors are incapable of staying clean.  Somehow the kitchen and bathroom continually need work.  Why can't we just live in the garage for a while?!

The thought occurred to me: How much to I prepare my heart (as Christ's home) for His coming?

I rarely give too much thought to the second coming or end times.  I tend to feel that dissecting the details of what may happen is a waste of time when, regardless of your views, the implications are exactly the same: Love God and Love People to show God's Love!  I was challenged, however, to ponder how ready I am to show myself to my Lord, whether He comes to me or I go to Him.

Do I have too much clutter in my life?  Am I hoarding things that speak more to the things of my own personal desires and not the desires of Christ?  If I was called to Him tomorrow, what would I want to clean up, remove, or redo?

One of the things that I am currently struggling with is my "purpose."  Because we have chosen to keep our family as it is, we do feel we are uniquely situated to do something.  I don't exactly know what.  It's part of our NEED LESS PROJECT.  We want to position ourselves to be able to be used in whatever way God calls us.  At this exact moment, I don't feel ready to meet Christ.  I want to redo a few things and I'm not sure how long to wait to begin.  I want to pursue purpose!  My heart is telling me there is more than what I am doing and that I have a calling that is greater.  Fortunately, I know God is working and as I am listening, I am confident that God will reveal His desires for me.  I'm pretty sure my life will be changing in the next year and I'm not sure how, exactly.  One more thing I can find comfort in, is that God is using this moment to prepare me for whatever it is He will do.  Time is never wasted.

In the time I have been given, I want to do better preparation.  I need to de-clutter and spruce up a few places in my life and spend a bit of effort on places that I have been letting go too long.

This is a showing for which I want to be prepared!

Saturday, April 10, 2010

Oh Vanity!

I was visiting with a co-worker the other day and explaining the reasons why I no longer wear shorts.

I, for some reason, still own one pair and actually donned them for two hours last summer while I was working out in the yard and it reached an unearthly temperature of 72.  It was on the south side of the house, there was no wind, and I'm positive the thermometer read 90-something.  It was only for two hours, though, and I was able to quickly revert back to my jeans once the sun began it's northern fall.  Yes, the sun sets in the north up here in the summer, and come to think of it, also rises in the north in the summer; just opposite sides of north!

When we moved up to The Great Land, I was not saddened to relinquish my shorts, as I never particularly liked pictures of me wearing them.  I couldn't remember feeling awkward with them on, but really hated those pictures!  I clearly needed TLC's What Not to Wear's help in choosing the right fit, but instead, moved to a place that no longer dictated that I wear them.  I began to notice the melanin leaving my legs once we arrived in this great state.  It happened rather slowly, but definitively.  I chose at one point to pay for the opportunity to have cancerous rays accompanied with luscious warmth poured around my body.  I've often suggested that the owners of such establishments have a room that has Happy Lights, a sauna, and then a spray tan!  I'd pay for that.  Well, I did convince the melanin to return to my skin through those months, but I felt a bit like I was playing cancer roulette.  I haven't been back.

Just recently I have noticed the "cancer-free" look of my legs again, and have been tempted to return to the warming lights of destruction.  (I've heard too many real-life tales of skin cancer to pursue it too much)  I have realized that cellulite is much, much less visible on tanned skin.  I was also alerted in the last few moments that I have sprouted yet another lovely situation that I can only assume would be less visible with less of a contrasting color of pigment.  I have had a couple varicose veins behind my knee for some time and have lamented that genealogical curse a number of years back.  I've just discovered that I am now in the possession of spider veins as well.  Oh joy.  As I am not likely to spend the incredible amount of money for such a vain vein, I may feel the need for some tinted lotion.

Wednesday, April 7, 2010

Where I've Been

I have not been avoiding you.  I promise.
I have been extremely busy with our NEED LESS PROJECT and getting our house up on the market.
The cleaning up and cleaning out is simply endless and it makes me almost glad to keep my moving every 3 years streak alive!  Just imagine the clutter I'd collect if I stayed in one place for too long!  Yes, you are right, it's mostly my husband who is the "collector," but I thought I'd try to share blame!

The house is now listed on Craigslist and Alaskalist and I've started a blog to post more information and pictures at 47130autumnroad.blogspot.com.  It is coming along and we've had an interested party call inquiring more.  They are from California, so not being able to come by is a hindrance to them and thus requires me to send more.  I'm perfectly fine with that!  I'm rather excited as a matter of fact!  I just wish I didn't have this pesky job thing to go to so I could devote my time to gathering and sending information!!  Oh, well.  The joys of selling.

We have both been extremely motivated to finish projects and create new ones on our house.  It has been fascinating to see how God has been providing funds to do so.  I don't imagine He's doing this to help us live in a home that is nicer.  I'm sure it is because He will sell it soon!  I doubt He feels any necessity in a stainless dishwasher over a white one, especially since it doesn't even work as well, but He provided it!  Our next big project will be to redo the deck and since the snow is beginning to melt, we should be able to kick that off in a week or two, barring any future snow dumps.  We still have some tweaking to do on the house and are contemplating putting in new cabinets/counter for the kitchen, but not too sure about that one just yet.  I know HGTV recommends it, but if we can sell it without, we will!  We'd have to raise our price if we do too much renovation!  Shucks!

I just thought I'd give an update on where I've been and where I'll likely be for a short bit.  I will try to keep updated!  Thanks for all the encouragements!