Mocha on the Mount Medicine

Late again, I know.
This morning, this week really, we have been studying Matthew 7 in the Sermon on the Mount. It's the "ouch" part. Well, yes, it's all pretty tough, but this was particularly finger-pointing.
Does "the pot calling the kettle black" sound familiar? Yeah, that's the section that I have been mulling over.
I wonder if the measure I have doled out judgment is going to be applied to me? In some respects, I hope it is. My ultimate desire is to have the wisdom to use the Word as my measure. As much as I agree that we should "measure up," I also know that it is impossible. I know that it is not my place to pronounce judgment. Does that even make sense?! It does in my head, so forgive me if it is a bit disjointed!
All this to say, that I have been really pressed to carefully examine the potential for logs that require eye surgery. "Why do you see the speck in your brother's eye, but fail to see the beam of wood in your own? Or how can you say to your brother, 'Let me remove the speck from your eye,' while there is a beam in our own? You hypocrite! First remove the beam from your own eye, and then you can see clearly to remove the speck from our brother's eye." I have seen anew the directions here. We ARE to help each other see more clearly, but only if we can see clearly ourselves. We are also to do this without a critical or judgmental spirit. That's my "ouch."
My own pride seems to be inflated when I can "discern" what someone else ought to do. I can surely see the situation much more clearly and my ideas are most certainly God's will. It just makes the most sense. And doesn't God always make sense to us?! While I can see the huge error of this thinking, I do think it is applicable to help each other. It just all depends on the heart attitude. I can only be effective in helping others if I am humbly seeking God's will for me. If it is God's will for me to help others, He will give me the tools to do so. That often requires eye surgery. I am then forced to see if I am living up to the standards that I want to set up. Of course, none of us can if our standards are God's standards. My heart is then put in check, and I can more properly discern if I should become involved or not. God will open the door if necessary.
Lord, help me not to worry so much about what other people do, but rather where my heart is. I want to honor you with my words and deeds, but mostly with my heart. I ask that if you call me to intervene in anyone's life, that it is all about glorifying you and truly helping them, not filling my pride. Keep me aware of my state of grace whenever I feel a critical spirit towards others coming. I still see the brevity of life and want to build my relationship with you that sustains me when other relationships fail me. Help me to continue to seek your glory, not my own.

Monday? Oops.

I know. It's past Monday. I didn't make it. I don't really have any good reasons except that I didn't make it a priority yesterday!
Actually, I was in a feeling of being rushed all day. I accidentally slept in and had 45 minutes to get up, take care of the dogs and my plants, get my lunch, (oh and get ready), and head out the door. I had forgotten to ask/tell my employers that I would be a bit late due to a meeting I had, so I left a note on the door of the office. I felt a bit immature and foolish. Ah well. Humility.

Speaking of, I think I'll have to really practice that trait this coming week. I've been blessed (yes, the kind that brings me in closer relationship with Christ) to bring myself down and soften my heart. My dad is coming up on Thursday to visit for a week. We plan to go camping in Denali for the first few days - just us two. My marvelous man could not join us due to his now busy work schedule, for which we are thankful. At first I was not remotely happy about this turn of events, but the last couple weeks, God has placed in me the excitement and desire to go. We will likely have marginal weather, but that's what makes for good memories, right?!

I am glad I have allowed the Lord to work in me lately. Why do I insist on "putting my foot down," when it makes me miserable? It is so freeing to let the Lord take the burdens and just enjoy the filling of His love. I am learning to love without loving the actions of others. Easier said than done, and I am by no means finished. I'd say I'm in the elementary lessons. Considering my love of learning, I have to admit that I don't particularly love being in the elementary class. I fancy myself much higher. (I have been a Christian most of my life, after all!) Oh how Christ corrects our lofty thoughts of ourselves.

Studying the sermon on the mount has been very pointedly showing me my tendencies for Pharisitical heart-attitudes. Deep down I pride myself on my extensive knowledge of scripture and it's theological implications. I have always enjoyed my "deep" conversations about theology with my brothers, specifically. This type of conversation is not wrong, but when I use my knowledge to, even secretly, lord it over others, it has corrupted me. I am no better than anyone else. I began to sing the old Psalty song that I remembered as a child, "Make me a Servant." (Charity Church mouse sang it in a very fitting story line, if you don't remember!) It was so amazing. So hard. So good.

Make me a servant,
humble and meek.
Lord, let me lift up,
those who are weak.
And may the prayer of my heart always be:
Make me a servant, today.

I pray that throughout this next week (and everyday, really) that I would be made into a servant.

Monday's Mocha on the Mount

I have started a study by Sandra Glahn called Mocha on the Mount. It is, probably obviously, about the sermon on the mount. I've been stuck on the concept of "blessing." I was really moved by the author's revelation that blessings are not what we typically think; money, health, anything else that we desire. Blessing "depends on being rightly related to God despite external circumstances."
When am I blessed?
When I am poor in spirit, when I mourn (over my sinful state), when I am meek (humble, gentle and lowly), when I am hungry and thirsty for righteousness, when I am merciful, when I am pure in heart, when I can be a peacemaker, and when I am persecuted for my righteousness.
Nowhere does Jesus say I am blessed when I have more money than I thought so I can buy a new couch, or when my day of fishing is good when I have a pantry full of food, or any other moment when I've received more than I deserve and choose to keep it for myself.
True, these things can possibly bring me blessing, but only if it brings me closer to my Savior.

In church yesterday, we had a visitor who spoke about the truly impoverished in Kenya. He spoke about how his ministry brought Jesus to children along with soccer and clean drinking water. He spoke about how these are the people about whom Jesus referred to when he last told his disciples to "GO!" These are the nations that need to hear about Jesus and these are the nations that are persecuted for righteousness.

Am I blessed? I don't really know. In my comfy American terms, yes. In my uncomfortable, low, persecuted terms, no. I have to be honest and agree in part with Ken Gire in The Reflective Life, as quoted in the study:
"But honestly I want to be like the Christ who turned water into wine, not the Christ who thirsted on a cross. I want to be the clothed Christ, not the one whose garment was stripped and gambled away. I want to be the Christ who fed the five thousand, not the one who hungered for forty days in the wilderness.... This is the dark side of Christianity, the side we don't see when we sign up. That if we want to be like Christ, we have to embrace both sides of His life. What else could it mean when the Bible talks about 'the fellowship of His suffering'? How could we enter that fellowship apart from suffering? How could we truly know the Man of Sorrows acquainted with grief if we had not ourselves known grief and sorrow?"

Blessed are those who are persecuted for righteousness, for the kingdom of heaven belongs to them. Matthew 5:10